--- title: "Thank You Mentality" description: "A talk on the everyday entitlement most of us carry, and the habit of gratitude that answers it." author: "Rahim Rasul" type: "Podcast episode" series: "Halftime Talks" episode: 97 published: "2016-06-29" duration: "13 min" theme: "Appreciation and perspective" tags: "gratitude, entitlement, appreciation, perspective" audio: "https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/rahimrasul/HTT097_ThankYou.mp3?dest-id=175061" url: "https://iloveprocess.com/halftime/thank-you-mentality/" site: "I Love Process" --- # Thank You Mentality _A talk on the everyday entitlement most of us carry, and the habit of gratitude that answers it._ **The question:** When will you give yourself a chance to luxuriate, to stand on the precipice of where you are in life? Listen: https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/rahimrasul/HTT097_ThankYou.mp3?dest-id=175061 ## Before you listen This talk is about the value and virtue of cultivating a thank you mentality. It begins with a quiet kind of spoiled: failing to fully see or appreciate the value of what we have. Living in Buckhead, Atlanta, eating a burrito across the street, I overheard a 16-year-old complain that his parents wouldn't get him the car he wanted as soon as he wanted it, and I shook my head at the spoiled kid. Years later I realized each of us does the same. I have sat in the second row at a concert, right off center, and spent the first twenty minutes wishing I were one row closer. We even critique Jay Z against his own greatness. Listen for the thank-yous near the close, to my parents and to you for choosing to listen. Keep wanting the front row. A thank you mentality keeps it in perspective, and it is hard to feel entitled while you hold one. ## From the talk > It's become so part of us and ingrained within us to feel so dissatisfied by what surrounds us that we fail to truly appreciate the blessings. > > I am happy where I am and eager for more. > > A thank you mentality understands that other people's efforts contributed to what you are currently doing right now. ## Transcript Today's episode, what we're going to be talking about is that entitlement feeling and seeing that spoiled Enos and others and how that relates to us and how we can use it to help propel an author our story in a more deliberate impactful way. So hey, if you're ready, like I'm ready to begin this episode, strapping your seatbelts, open your mind prepare to take some notes. And as I say, at the very least let them be mental notes. So without further ado, let's kick off this episode. I want to begin this episode by defining and declaring the kind of spoil that I'm talking about. I'm not talking about the spoil that is a behavioral issue. That is a psychological issue that a child or somebody else would speak to somebody disrespectfully and feel entitled to things that they have no, no claims upon. I'm talking about a spool where one does not fully see nor appreciate the value on what they have. And it can be said that I have a chip on my shoulder. I've had a chip on my shoulder and the perspectives that I've experienced is always from the perspective of acquiring, not lavishing. And so one is the climb and the other is the celebration on the top of the mountain. And even at a young age. I remember being in school, as long as I didn't have pro wings or athletic clubs, I was happy. Any kind of Nike would do if I had a check on it. Boom, I have passed that threshold of not being able to make fun of me just because of my shoes. And so even a $29 pair of Nike Cortez was good enough. By the way now those shoes are like 60 Man inflation is a beast. So we've all seen spoiled we've all seen and understand how it's created. You have the parent that wants to love the kid so much that they give things give Have things over and over again and it sets up this entitled kind of environment where nothing is good enough only the demands that they create in their mind and imagination will be good enough. I remember at one point I lived in Atlanta, Georgia, the Buckhead area. It's a very prestigious part of town where you have a lot of million dollar plus homes. And across the street one day at most, I was eating a burrito. I overheard a conversation between this 16 year old and you have to understand that this is an area as I will come to this Mo's, I see kids driving around in Land Rovers Range Rovers, seven series BMW five, five series been C class, right. And so this kid is literally I watched him walk in in a very luxurious car. And I overheard him talking to his friend about the kind of car that his parents were refusing to necessarily get him as soon as he wanted it. And they were trying to get him a new BMW for his seventh to eighth birthday. I remember sitting there with my chips and burrito, shaking my head with my head down, like Man, there's one little spoiled kid. You know, it wasn't until years later that I realized that each of us needs to look in the mirror and realize that we do the same thing. Maybe not on such a grand level, but we do it on a daily, weekly, monthly level. It's become so part of us and ingrained within us to feel so dissatisfied by what surrounds us that we fail to truly appreciate the blessings. Now, what do I mean? When do I do this? You might ask yourself? Well, there been times when I've sat in a concert, right, either standing remotely or a CD concert, and I might have been in a second row, second row right off the center. And the only thing I could think of for the first 2025 minutes is man, if I could only be in a row in front of me, it would be better not understanding that I am in the 95th Plus percentile of views upon the stage. But something has been baked into our thinking that there is this constant source of dissatisfaction with what we have like we are always on the climb that we were always on the hunt that when will you give yourself a chance to luxuriate to stand on the precipice of where you are in life. And celebrate, and revel and acknowledge that the death experiences that you're living right now, or born out of that previous dissatisfaction. Now, I'm not telling you to give up on wanting to be in the front row, I'm not telling you to give up on the goals and desires and the dreams you have. But one thing I am asking you to do is keep it in perspective. When I listen to music, somebody like Jay Z comes to mind, obviously, he is probably the most celebrated rapper of all time. Obviously, he's in your top five most likely, big, all these other guys right? But yet we still have the audacity to critique his music. Why can we not appreciate the work that he has done? And guess what, we're not necessarily critiquing him, against his peers, we're critiquing him against his self, when you compare the greatness of someone to themselves, understand that distinction and maintain perspective. So instead of sounding like I'm preaching to you, what I really beseech upon you is this one gem this one thing that if you can go into your lives on a daily, hourly, weekly, monthly, lifetime basis with I think you'll be better for it. Have a thank you, mentality. Thank you. Thank you for all the things have added up. For me to even have this perspective. I am happy where I am and eager for more but never allowing the satisfaction to creep in. Thank you for my parents who put me in a position to learn from their lives and mine as well. Thank you for all the technology that has amassed that allow me to create this podcast with my voice my mic my computer and it's great A table that I can broadcast into the world with a thank you mentality, we do not fail to appreciate how these blessings began to add a, we do not fail to appreciate how it came to our lives, we did not fail to appreciate the life that had to be live for this to even be realized. Thank you mentality allows us to keep our lives in perspective. Perspective, perspective, perspective is one of the key hallmarks of what this podcast is all about. The Thank you mentality gives you the perspective and understanding that it didn't just start here. A Thank you mentality understands that other people's efforts contributed to what you are currently doing right now that everybody doesn't have to be there and nobody owes you anything for you to participate with me, means you made a choice to so thank you. It is hard to feel spoiled, or be spoiled. With a thank you mentality. It's hard to feel entitled, with a thank you mentality. It's hard to stand above people like a king with a thank you mentality. You move like a king, but hold the common touch.